Wednesday, February 1, 2006

Viagra? What the hell, I already posted about orgies and condoms

This morning...

Substitute Receptionist: Absent-minded Secretary? Can you take this call for me?
Absent-minded Secretary: Sure, what is it?
SR: Just someone filling out a renewal application...
AMS: Okay?

After 20 minutes of yelling loudly and repeating every word at least three times to the elderly woman with a hearing problem...

Elderly Woman With Hearing Problem: Do you know that the new Medicare prescription program has eliminated over half of my medications? They won't even cover my heart medication that I have been on for 30 years! And you know what they do cover? Viagra! Can you believe they cover Viagra?

AMS: Yes, because most politicians are men.
EWWAHP: What?!
AMS: MOST POLITICIANS ARE MEN.
EWWAHP: Can you repeat that? It sounded that that was funny, I want to hear what you said.
AMS: (Taking a deep breath, trying not to be self-conscious about the fact that half of the office staff has gathered around my desk to see why I am yelling about male politicians) AMS: MOST POLITICIANS ARE MEN!!!!
EWWAHP: Most politicians are what?
AMS: MOST POLITICIANS ARE MEN! THAT'S WHY THEY WANT VIAGRA FOR FREE!!!!
EWWAHP: Ahh, that was funny! What is your name?

I won't go into that part of the conversation. It took too long in real life. Although, it got really funny with references to the Waltons and all.

AMS to Substitute Receptionist: That, was not nice.
SR: It was funny though.
AMS: Sure, now everyone thinks that I am a man-hater.
SR: Or they think that you give politicians a reason to want Viagra.

And since I am posting about Viagra, why not an underwear reference. (Sorry that it's FOX News.) Energize Your Underpants

"Forget the Flintstones, all you need for your daily vitamin dose is a pair of souped-up skivvies.

Trendy Australian undies maker aussieBum has rolled out vitamin-infused undies called Essence, according to The New York Post.

Company founder Sean Ashby told the paper health-care giant Bayer developed the drawers' special blend of polyester and lycra to "trap organic substances, which are then released slowly by natural body heat."

The enlivening underpants offer "dermo-protective properties" and "give your whole body an overall feeling of well-being," the company said.

The beefed-up briefs come in acerola, a plant rich in vitamin C, ginseng and the company hopes to release a Viagra version soon, Ashby told The Post.

The concept was cooked up by "a bunch of us sitting around the pub last year, having a few beers, when I asked, 'What can we do with our knickers that'll be the next big thing?'" Ashby told The Post.

"One of my guys joked that we should put vitamins in them and everyone laughed. But the next day I realized what a great idea that was," he said..."


I thought that all underwear had "dermo-protective properties" isn't that the point?

6 comments:

edgy killer bunny said...

Oh. My. Hell. Too funny for words. Too. Funny.

Th. said...

.

Whoo. Do they come in headbands?

erin.h said...

th.: Are you telling me that you want a Viagra headband?

edgy: I have a Washington Post article that I want to share with you. It's making me mad. Really mad. And I can't figure out why. http://www.washingtonpost.com/wp-dyn/content/article/2006/01/30/AR2006013001608.html?sub=AR

Absent-minded Secretary said...

Damn it! Stoopid family blog, that's twice I've done that tonight.

edgy killer bunny said...

TexMom passed that article on to me yesterday. I almost blogged about it. Maybe, now that you've referred it to me as well, I should.

Absent-minded Secretary said...

I wish you would. Then you can tell me why it is making so mad.